2020 is the Year of Simplicity

We have all become overburdened and stressed out. We take on too much and we are spread too thin. LET IT GO.

Whatever isn’t necessary for your life, let’s all downsize. Who are we doing all of this for anyway?

Look at your facebook for example. How many groups are you a member of? How many do you really participate in?

If that number doesn’t equal out it’s time to downsize. 

The same goes for followers and friends. Unless you are making money promoting, why are you bothering to entertain the world? For 2020 choose quality over quantity, life isn’t a competition.

While you are at it, click unsubscribe from all that junk email!

The focus of energy and attention can make your experience more fulfilling. There is no need to be a part of everything. Pick what speaks to you and move in that direction.

None of us are who we were a year ago…

Best wishes for an amazing 2020!

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Beauty Advice for Millenial and GenZ Women from a GenX’r

You all are being bombarded with magazine and web images that have been so overly retouched with Photoshop I am sure half of you don’t even know what’s real anymore. It’s not your fault. It is, however, affecting you.

Because everything you see around you screams perfection, you expect perfection out of yourself. Here is the truth girls. There is no such thing as perfect or flawless. Even the models and online influencers don’t really look like that. 

There is no way (in person) to live up to that standard of beauty. Having done editorial and fashion editing we stretch models necks, legs, waists, squeeze in their thighs arms, and waists, remove any trace of a wrinkle (even the ones that need to be there to bend like the lines on your wrists, elbows, and underarms) and decimate every scratch, scar, or zit.

There needs to be some realism in what you consider beautiful, especially when it comes to yourself. 

We are all perfect in and of ourselves in our own way. There is no one else who could be a better you than you… that’s fact. So let’s start looking at the positives and stop focusing on our own perceived negatives. We all have good qualities and others we wish were different. Chances are when people look at you they see more of the good than the bad. No one is as hard on you as you are.

Now age 45 I had decided at age 26 that I was going to be ageless. In retrospect, I think this was a brilliant declaration, mostly because it seems to be working. Because of this people often are asking me what I know that they don’t.

I think some of it is of course genetics. But I will pass along the things I have learned, some of which I wish someone had told me sooner.

  1. The fastest places women age are in the hands, neck, and face. Exfoliate, wash, and moisturize. It doesn’t really seem to matter what you use either. I have tried super expensive high end and it doesn’t do anything more than what I use now. Dove soap, random body wash, sugar scrub (which I use on my face as well) and moisturizer.

2.   Drink a gallon of water daily. Hydration is key.

3.   Do occasional internal cleanses – colon, cellular, liver, gallbladder, all of it. Every few years seem to be fine as long as you don’t have any health issues going on. 

4.   Exercise – Yep, get off your butt and move. Pick something you find fun and can stick with. We need some weight-bearing exercises to build muscle, not just cardio. As you get older the more muscle base you have not only do you look better but the better you hold together as well.

5. Smile. – Happiness and laughter keep you young. Sadness, depression, and shitty attitude will age you. Everyone goes through dark periods. I am not saying be Pollyanna 24/7 but find happiness and cherish it. Leave bad situations as fast as possible.

6. Vent! – Never keep emotions bottled up. That leads to illness. Illness ages you drastically because it is mentally, spiritually, and physically exhausting. 

7. Meditate – it has been proven that getting in a theta brain wave state can heal and help slow down aging so make the time. 

8. Save the high heels for special occasions, not daily wear – I was told this and I did not listen. Google ‘Bunion’. You have a very good chance of forming them on your feet if you always wear high heels. Do you look hot? Sure! Is it worth it if you are in pain 10 or 20 years from now and the only way to correct the bone malformation is surgery? Believe me – it’s not. Wear some flats and save the heels for a night out.

9. Eat well but don’t deprive yourself. Life is short. Be healthy but also balance that with happy. Have a treat once in a while…

10. Don’t wash your hair unless it’s dirty – over-washing your hair leads to it looking and feeling bad. You wouldn’t keep tossing an angora sweater in the washing machine would you? Of course not. Be good to your hair. Wash it as needed 1 or 2 times a week. The kind of shampoo depends on your hair type.

11. Your attitude and how you feel about yourself can make or break a beautiful woman. What you project outwardly in so far as how you feel about yourself is, to a great extent, how others will see you as well. Confidence is sexy. The need for constant reassurance is not.

12. The sun is good for you. It’s sunscreen that can cause cancer. Sun is the cure. Don’t bake yourself like a cookie but do get 15-20 min of direct sunlight a day. It helps your body’s defenses and frankly, we all just feel good with a tan.

13. Posture – sit up straight. It looks more elegant and keeps your spine from forming that “old lady curve” as you age. 

14. Stretch! – the more limber you stay the easier it will be to maintain that as you age. If you don’t use it you lose it, they weren’t kidding!

15. Makeup – Wash it off at night and give your skin a chance to breathe.

16. RAW Honey as a face mask – wipe on and leave like a face mask 15 min a day. It can clear old scars (just not keloid). It helps your complexion and leaves your skin smooth.

17. Take good care of your teeth – nice white teeth give the appearance of youth so brusha-brusha girls! Floss too! Teeth are very expensive to repair and or replace.

18. Steer clear of permeant makeup. It may look great now but trends change!

19. Throw the rules out the window: If you want to wear something – wear it. Life is short, who cares what anyone else thinks!

20. It’s more than ok to pop pimples and pick oil balls out of your face. Your skin is trying to push that stuff out. Give it a hand just be gentle… A magnifying mirror is your friend.

21. Get massages and take care of yourself! relaxation and healing are key. Health is beauty.

Ok! Hopping off my soapbox now!
I hope you all got something out of that.
Thanks for reading!

Sarah Julie Barendse-Elrod Age 45

Discordant Energy

While friends don’t always need to agree on everything there comes a point in many friendships where there just isn’t enough left in common to maintain the bond. Discord becomes the key element and you find yourself being off-put by that person’s energy rather than drawn in as you used to be. It doesn’t mean you don’t care about them anymore or that any love you had for them is gone, it does sometimes mean that you may both be better off moving on in life, separately.

Life is to be enjoyed harmoniously with the universe and with others. Anything that seems in opposition to that needs to be released for your own highest good as well as that of the other person.