Words are powerful

Words are powerful. When spoken with intention they can lift you up or crush your spirit. The problem is that many of us speak without thinking, especially in the heat of the moment, and unfortunately words that cannot be unsaid can last a lifetime.

 

The words of others have helped to shape who we are, how we think, how we view the world, and more importantly how we see ourselves. But what if the view we have been given isn’t accurate?

Often these embedded thoughts have been spoken through filters of other people’s views, projecting their insecurities, weaknesses and anger on to us.

 

One of the most powerful statements I have heard spoken is “Mean people hurt”.

It holds a double meaning and a vicious circle effect. Those who are angry towards others do hurt them through their words and actions, but they have also been hurt and are hurting or they would not feel the need to lash out.

 

Choosing to live consciously, pause and think before speaking and break that repetitive destructive cycle is the only way free.

 

This little story “The Fence” is one of the most poignant illustrations I have ever come across and I wanted to share it with you.

 

“There once was a little boy who had a bad temper. His father gave him a bag of nails and told him that every time he lost his temper, he must hammer a nail into the fence.

 

The first day the boy had driven 37 nails into the fence. Over the next few weeks as he learned to control his anger, the number of nails hammered daily, gradually dwindled down. He discovered it was easier to hold his temper than to drive those nails into the fence.

 

Finally the day came when the boy didn’t lose his temper at all. He told his father about it and the father suggested that the boy now pull out one nail for each day that he was able to hold his temper. The days passed and the young boy was finally able to tell his father that all the nails were gone.

 

The father took his son by the hand and led him to the fence. He said, “You have done well, my son, but look at the holes in the fence. The fence will never be the same.

When you say things in anger, they leave a scar just like this one.” You can put a knife in a man and draw it out. It won’t matter how many times you say I’m sorry, the wound is still there. Make sure you control your temper the next time you are tempted to say something you will regret later.” – Author Unknown

 

Treat others as you yourself would like and expect to be treated. It will come back to you either way.

 

Originally Published: Alberta Street News – “Back on Track” Column, Sarah J. Barendse

 

How to come from a place of abundance when you have nothing

Article originally Published for : Alberta Street News

“The true measure of a man is how much he would be worth if he lost everything.” – Unknown.

Your worth and value doesn’t come from the car you drive, what you have or where you live. It is inherent, intrinsic, and cannot be taken from you. It is reflected in your character, the way you live your life and the way you treat other people.

I have seen numerous YouTube videos lately where events are staged to look like someone is out on the street and down on their luck or having a hard time where they really need some help out in public. I have been highly disappointed in the vast majority who just walk on by, ignoring them, even when the person has been face down in the middle of a busy sidewalk.

Many of the bystanders who actually do come to the aid of that person have been homeless themselves and have the very least to give (monetarily). What does this say about our society?

Have many of us become so jaded that we can’t see what is right in front of us; our fellow human beings in need of help. Is it that we don’t care? Don’t feel one person can make a difference? I don’t really have an answer for that.

What I do know is that we are all connected. Treating someone as if they do not matter is unacceptable. Everyone matters. We need to stop judging on appearance. Look past the surface; clothing, hair, skin color, or whatever it is that is keeping us back from looking into that persons eyes and seeing another living breathing human being.

This is a two-sided coin.

 

On the other side of that, how do you deal with people when you don’t have a place to call home or sometimes even food to eat? Feeling badly or ashamed of your situation or worse about yourself, won’t help things. Our current situations in life are always an echo. They are a combination manifestation of our past thoughts, actions and happenstance. Dwelling on it will likely push that echo on to the future and get you more of the same.

Breaking free of this cycle isn’t an easy thing to do, for any of us, and being in a bad situation currently does make it harder so please don’t think I am discounting that.

Acceptance of where you are now is the first step because the fact is – you are where you are regardless of what you think or how you feel about it. Take a good look around you. Life is all about perspective no matter what you do or don’t have. Rich or poor. They both are a state of mind that projects outwardly and into your reality. Take stock of what you do have that is good in your life. Friends, Family, a pet, a nice place to rest, a sunny day, anything that brings even the slightest joy to your life. Focus on that which makes you feel good or even a little bit better. Do your best to ignore the rest. The truth is that when you live in gratitude for what you already have, however perceived little it may be, more will come into your life to be grateful for.

All of us are infinitely valuable, more so than we realize. We all individually have the power to touch someone’s life. Make sure you do so in a positive way, even if it’s just with a smile or kind word.